Present Headache of Weddings
What does the season of winter do to a lot of us more especially to our parents? Well, along with cold freezing weather, it seems to bring us a lot of cards.
Happy New Year cards tend to bring a smile to our faces, well at least relief. While certain other cards have the influence of bringing on frowns.
But our folks put on a brave face- a smiling one I might add to the people who bring those labeled wedding ceremony and say the inevitable word ….
All of a sudden the cold seems more unbearable and our folks, their bones shivering hit the sack wondering how many more cards await them.
Such cards may be labeled happy weddings but to our old man, they are labeled bank balance minus a considerable amount of money.
And if it is of a close relative it reads bank balance minus a considerable amount of money.
Their last thoughts- why on earth do they all have to get married in one season?
What does a card imply?
Along with an invitation for the Mr. and Mrs. of the house, their names usually misspelled to the ceremony rather than the feast, at the end of the card there is a line written in invisible ink-by the way dear chaps, don’t forget the presents.
Let’s call the latter a traditional implication or a clearly defined social obligation.
We dare not ignore such cards because we’ll surely be in for-‘Oh, they chickened out because of the presents.
Come, on a guy earns an honest living, pays his income tax even though painful as it may be, and doesn’t relish the idea of quite a few bucks existing in his pocket in a tight month; can you blame him for the wary smile on his face?
To top it up if our presents don’t meet the expectations of the concerned, we are in for-‘What is it given.’
An aunt of mine, well educated and without any question means well cherishes the tradition of buying presents on such occasions.
She doesn’t mind close relatives of the bride or groom helping them out with necessities like the freezer, sofa, bed, wardrobe, and come to even heavy gold ornaments!
I had to put the question to her one aunt, isn’t dowry the appropriate name for helping them out? Don’t be silly!’ she said.
One would like to think the invited guests would attend the ceremony, socialize with others and have a few laughs, a pleasant meal, and most importantly, which we frequently forget, find it in themselves to make a good wish for the bride and groom.
Need we inflict financial pressure on the invited guests by the way of presents?
Perhaps we dare let such a thought enter our minds as all the presents add up to a massive lucrative amount.
An uncountable feeling creeping into all of us who have been helped out, is there?
Where money is concerned we do tend to flush self-respect down the toilet without ever noticing it.
The idea of writing –presents shall not be accepted at the bottom of the wedding card will undoubtedly strike most of us as foreign, a thing unheard of, a preposterous thought, absurd!
Our young generation might fancy the idea. But one must wonder how many of them have the guts to introduce this best-forgotten thought and take a stand.
How many of us would actually turn our backs to the numerous tempting presents that will be ours simply if we desire them?
I reckon it’s time to change our attitude and relieve our relatives, friends, and associations from the burden of present headaches.